I'll never love again (yes, I will)

 

Look at how happy I am – ignore that it was a put-on smile, flashed between barking photo-taking directions at hubby and trying not to have a head-on collision with a garage door – but yes, HAPPY! Did I know then, though, that my love-affair with two wheels would be so fleeting? Serves me right for being trusting. Oh, no one would ever come through our back yard and into our garage to steal our bikes in TORONTO. Never. But yes, of course they would. And of course they did.

Alex and I had our babies stolen this weekend. And while my bike was bought for practical no-fuss, gettin'-around reasons, and not lust-at-first-sight like my current crush, I became quite attached to the old girl. She didn't fail me. Not once. Except that she went and got herself stolen. Girl, didn't I teach you to be wary of strangers?! Deaf ears, man. Sadly, a salesperson with atrocious handwriting is the reason that I will never see her again – a completely illegible serial number is no use for the police report. She's gone. 

While I mourn and eat ice cream in my favourite sweats (the appropriate reaction to any break-up, yeah?), a girl's gotta move on at some point.

The time is now.

I'm at the acceptance stage already, I think. A girl with a penchant for dramatics has a lot of history with (self-inflicted) grief. Man, I just roll through the 5 levels now, and I don't even think I stop on denial anymore. Express train.

Bright side? It's an opportunity to get a bike that's maybe more "me". I picked a Norco hybrid for budget/practicality, but I'm not really doing much in the way of serious cycling, so I can afford to play the style-over-function card. I'll bike to the moon (the moon!), but I'm not racing. I just need something pretty that can handle a 50-minute round-trip commute. Something light, so I don't almost die when carrying it. Something that puts the whoosh back into my life. I fall in love easily, so that part won't be hard. But as hubby says, my eyes are bigger than my wallet. So is my heart. And my wanderlust. And my bucket list. Sigh. 

I used to think being simultaneously broke and in love was impossibly romantic. Kinda over it.

The Mister has back-up wheels secured, so because he thinks I'm meow (and wants an end to the pouting) he's helping me with my own search. It resulted in a Craigslist-related fight after I vetoed 600 of his picks. It's not my fault though!!! On my way home, I was wooed by Mikey, an adorable sales-creature at Curbside Cycle and this:

This!

I very nearly swooned when I perched atop this minty baby. Sex. Just sex. But oh, $650. Hrmm. Not crazy-expensive in nice-bike world. But nuts when you're trying to be a good girl on a budget and you had a perfectly good bike just 4 short days ago. Dolla-dolla-billz, y'all. I could find ways to justify it then heap it onto credit with an audible gulp. I'm a master at justifying my terrible choices. A fucking Jedi.

But no. I am resisting her intoxicating lure. I'm back on Craigslist (with a much less eager helper-bee) hoping that I don't crack and just buy the first thing I can find. I'll hit desperation very quickly. I'll wither without wind in my hair. I will.

In the meantime, let's engage in a little self-torture, shall we? Bike porn, baby:

From top: 1) Bobbin Birdie 2) Abici Primavera 3) Bobbin Firefly 4) Public Bikes 5) Public Bikes

Check out more here, on my Pinterest board! 

Manners, please.

Emily Post is rolling in her grave.

If she saw the state of bike/car relations in this city, well, she'd just (politely) freak out.

On my way to work the other day, I had an epiphany and, to save time, wrote a whole blog about it in my head while biking. I planned to put my head-blog to paper (err...) once I arrived at work. Coincidentally, someone else had the very same idea and beat me to the punch.

No matter. It saves me a lot of angry/passionate typing AND I'm sure grateful to have someone on my side. Miss Emma Woolley wrote this open letter to fellow cyclists and I recommend reading it. 

So my epiphany was this: my bike rage has increased to fire-y levels since cycling became my preferred mode of city transport 5 years ago. Every year I became angrier. And my rage was always directed at motorists. A natural enemy, right? Occasionally it was shot at the wishy-washy attempts of City Councilor Adam Vaughan (and City Hall in general) to improve bike-ability through our neighbourhood and the rest of city. But not until this revelation of a ride, did I discover how really misplaced my frustration had become. 

The cyclists vs. motorists vs. pedestrians war was one I fought naturally on the side of fellow cyclists (rights for bikes!) but I am defecting. I'm AWOL from this war. I realized three things:

1. This is not a clear cut "us vs. them" scenario - there are good people on all sides. And there are assholes. (This is similar to my thoughts about the G20... and, frankly, most wars.)

2. While I am mostly a cyclist (if I'm forced to be defined by my chosen mode of transport) I am also sometimes a pedestrian and occasionally a motorist. I'm not picking sides anymore.

...and lastly and most shockingly...

3. The worst culprits of all are cyclists.

There, I said it. My fellow cyclists are the most entitled and least accommodating in the dicey traffic dance. I am ashamed. More bike-goers than not assume 100% right of way, won't even so much as slow down at stop signs, and are generally non-courteous and unsafe. They give a bad name to the rest of us (just like a handful of jerk-offs do to all drivers). Thanks guys.

This isn't about laws or by-laws though. I'm a rule bender, but I believe in respect and kindness and etiquette. Ms. Post, I'm fighting the good fight! 

I was engaged in a 2-day Twitter debate with @bikeTO about the issue of courtesy and how it could go a long way to improve our streets. @bikeTO vehemently disagreed with me arguing that the only way to make streets bike-friendly is via an elaborate overhaul of the cycling infrastructure (the addition of separated bike lanes, etc). Well, wouldn't that be nice! I like dreaming too. Sometimes I'm a triple-threat Broadway diva. While Denzil Minnan-Wong is fighting for this issue (and is seemingly getting the right support for it) realistically, the plan is only a fraction of what needs to be done. Angrily pointing fingers at City Hall just isn't solving anything.

In the meantime, until roads are completely road friendly, we can be a little more friendly ourselves. My M.O. for this summer is paying forward courtesy and set a better example for my fellow cyclists. 

(In a later fully-validating moment, Joe from the unaffiliated @bikingtoronto tweeted wildly about the merits of bike courtesy.)

So, to my biking-class brethren, please hear the following: Making full stops at every stop sign is ridiculous, but slowing down, checking and giving the right-of-way where it's deserved is just common sense. Also, I get that sometimes you just gotta hop up onto the sidewalk for a block, or ride the wrong way on a one-way just to connect two safe routes. Really, I get it. But stop acting like you deserve to be there. You don't. You're borrowing that space from pedestrians and cars going the right way. I don't care if you wear a helmet or not, just stop doing things that might get your head smashed in. Or mine. Be aware, be patient, be accommodating. Oh, and read Emma's letter because I'm just gonna be redundant here.

@bikeTO sent me this video to "prove" that well-designed streets make for safer roads. While watching this video, though, I couldn't help but notice that caution and courtesy really made the design work:

Maybe the Dutch are just nicer people? Do you think this could really work in Toronto?

This video, shot at an intersection in NYC really hit home for me - while general lack of care or concern for others is happening all over the place, the dangerous entitlement of cyclists is a huge problem. It's very frustrating to watch:

3-Way Street from ronconcocacola on Vimeo.

The bicycle is the most civilized conveyance known to man.  Other forms of transport grow daily more nightmarish.  Only the bicycle remains pure in heart.  -Iris Murdoch

(Oh Iris, I wish.)

[ that's my girl. she gets me around. ]